z
zeldathemes

emiello:

Pros of dating me

  • i’m rly soft and squishy
  • i’ll make you hot beverages in bed
  • i’m good at compliments
  • you’ll gain lots of dorky pet names

Cons of dating me

  • ummm??
  • zero i am a god
h-uihe:

Have you ever been alone on this train? / When was the last time you were alone?

h-uihe:

Have you ever been alone on this train? / When was the last time you were alone?

southernshot:

girl-in-nike:

This commercial is amazing.

I work at an Under Armour store and we got to see this commercial way before they showed it on TV and everyone was speechless except one dude. He was all like “What the hell? Why the fuck would they make a ballet commercial? It’s not a sport.” My boss was quick to jump down his throat and said “Alright then get your ass on the floor and work on you tippy toes for the rest of your shift. If I fucking see you off them you will be the first of the temps to get cut!” He was on his tippy toes for the last hour and a half of his shift lol 

collegehumor:

dorkly:

Voldemort’s Assistant, Kevin

For more comics, visit Dorkly.com!

epikalia:

kanyewesticle:

Look at all those ducks there are at least ten

Well, you’re not wrong.

epikalia:

kanyewesticle:

Look at all those ducks there are at least ten

Well, you’re not wrong.

flourishtodecay:

mauridianhallow:

lambishwolf:

toptumbles:

This is called humanity


I have nothing to say on this, these people are the pinnacle of human compassion, and that is all there is to it.

They are so brave and honorable. Oh my goodness.

flourishtodecay:

mauridianhallow:

lambishwolf:

toptumbles:

This is called humanity

I have nothing to say on this, these people are the pinnacle of human compassion, and that is all there is to it.

They are so brave and honorable. Oh my goodness.

punkrightsactivist:

punkrightsactivist:

how do you find out if a fourteen year old smokes weed

just talk to them for like two minutes

elegantly-tasteless:

school board when they talking about whether to cancel school or not

elegantly-tasteless:

school board when they talking about whether to cancel school or not

paego:

animedley:

rosaparking:

PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA IS IS SUCH A JOKE LIKE WHATS NEXT??? STRAWBERRY SLICES ON RIBS??? PEACHES ON FRIES?????? CHERRIES IN LASAGNA????

SEQUIN MILKSHAKES???

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BOW TIE FRENCH FRIES????image

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